BINSTER
"On these long hot summer nights, I often find that nothing else fills
me with as much happiness as the simple practise of cat burgling."

www.abandonedsheep.com

RICH
The Wobbly bit innit

www.brfuk.com/rich/

KIRMIE
Born in cantation, raised by hydraulic lift, Kirsten, 5' 2", has been young
from an old age. Despite making page 17 of the Hampshire Chronicle in 1983
when her pancreas was stolen by various members of Classix Nouveaux, she likes
purple, Depeche Mode, brf, Afro Ken, snow and the 80s. A vehement critic of
Chomsky's Minimalist Program, former King of Thailand and melomaniac*, she
recently completed a Masters thesis which erroneously contained no references
to 80s music. She is unemployed; all job offers welcome. jobless@kirmie.co.uk.
* melomania = inordinate passion for music

www.kirmie.co.uk

MAJOR DUNDEE
Major Dundee is in fact Chad, who likes to use a computer to
make music in order to make music that doesn't sound like it was made on a
computer. He sometimes sings, but not today. He likes to be a jack of all
(well some) trades, and master of none.

remove@nme.com

TRADEMARK
In their quest for the ultimate uplifting song, Trademark ended up with two of them.
Eminent synthesist Dr Paul Soulsby explains:
"Could there be anything more uplifting than the perfect blend of artificially-generated
noise and true human emotion? This question is rhetorical, and the answer is no."

Stuart Meads, chairman of the Society of Synthesists and Electronic Musicians (SSEM), added:
"Intensive subjective listening tests carried out by the staff at Trademark proved beyond all doubt
that these two compositions were the ultimate uplifting songs ever recorded.
The subjective tests were so successful that this was proved in fact to be an objective truth."

Oliver Horton, public relations officer at Trademark concluded:
"The production of the two greatest songs in history and the discovery of an objective truth
were both previously thought to have been an objective impossibility.
This opens a million new doors for art, and another million doors for society.
That's [long pause] two million doors in total."

www.trademark-online.co.uk

A SCHOLAR AND A PHYSICIAN
We would be happy if we could grow up in a world without war.
A world where our children can play, without fear, with lasers and robots with laser attachments.
A world where poverty is history and where people who don't like art
are lawfully imprisoned for not understanding.
Only then will we be happy to bring children to mother earth.
Meanwhile they will stay in the capsule.
(occasionally burning holes in the capsule with lasers and robots with laser attachments)

http://www.ascholarandaphysician.com

Kid Crayola
Kid Crayola just loves to colour in and make the world a brighter, more crayony place.
Felt tip pens, colored pencils, poster paints and finger paints just have nothing on the humble crayon.
Seeing others with crayons is what brings joy to Crayola. Pastels, oils, watercolours and charcoal are just second rate crayons.
Tjhos who use pastels are in denial. Crayons are the true medium. Crayons are great.
They can last for years, if you look after them. And they have a very distinct smell.
The smell of Crayon is what makes Kid Crayola happy. The feel of them also does.
As do the colours of them. And the way they write on paper. All sorts of paper!
Not like some types of pens that only work on certain types of paper. Crayons work on anything.
Including skin. Crayons are absolutely fantastic.

http://www..com

Zak
Sunny days and the bottom of the sea shared with a sunken ship.

http://www..com

The Unflung Goose Moose Incipid Agiss-Eaters of Xorb ft. Raincoat
UFG were formed in the winter of 1997, comprising Jonny and Paul.
Chad joined later because we liked him. Then Oli joined because he blackmailed us.
We did and album which was rubbish, then split up.
Five years later we re-formed to record a follow up album.
Thankfully Chad had learnt to play more than three chords in that time.

Haz Plewis&Ash Verjee
Possibly from the moon, definetely from Earth. these guys make msuic together. Which is nice...

Nervous Testpilot
The Paul Taylor Worldwide Communcation Node says -
  Um...nervous_testpilot epitomises the lo-fi aesthetic.
he's the most dope down and dirty explorer of the smallest bit-rate regions.
He's here now, and he's not leaving till he's had some beans.

http://www..com

Burnished Monkey
As always....Rock as Fuck.

The Prophets
It's true!

Potato Marketing Board
After going out 'clubbing' on a Saturday evening, I like nothing bette
than watching ''hangover TV'' on a Sunday morning whilst tucking into a snack
of 'New Potato Kebabs'



Preparation Time: 5 mins
Cooking Time: 20 mins
Serves: 4
Tip: Great for barbecues, hangover cure, pre-raving snack, wild parties,
simply scale up the recipe by 3 to serve 12 (or by 30 to serve a rave of
300).



Ingredients
12 British new potatoes, scrubbed and halved
2 corn on the cob
12 cocktail sausages
3 tbsp barbeque sauce
Selection of dips to serve

Directions
1. Place the new potatoes and corn on the cob in a pan of
lightly salted boiling water. Cover and simmer for 15
minutes or until tender then drain. Cut the corn into 4.
2. Thread the potatoes, corn and sausages alternately onto
4 skewers, starting and finishing with potatoes.
3. Brush lightly with BBQ sauce and grill or barbecue for
10 minutes, turning occasionally until the sausages are
cooked.
4. Serve with a selection of dips.
5. Party hard!

http://www..com

The Leeroys
'Often accused of being a ska band, the Leroys are not. Enjoy this song safe in the knowledge that Paul Schneiter (the frenchman on drums) was not entirely sobre, and that the Iraqi on guitar (Jessam al-Jawad) IS NOT affiliated to al-Quaida. The Leroys have postponed their American tour until Jess is sure he won't be incarcerated indefinitely and beaten up by old men in grey macs who stink of coffee and cigarettes. Mac (Andrew McCormack) misses biscuits and gravy, so he's hoping this won't be too long. As for Luke, he's wondering if Jess will be pissed off when he reads this, but guesses that he probably won't. Won't read it, that is... We don't steal bicycles but we do steal groceries - usually from eachother.'

http://stage.vitaminic.co.uk/main/the_leeroys/all_tracks/